There are some of us who look into a mirror and see greatness. A few of us don't bother to look into the mirror at all, because we're happy with who we are. I belong to a group that look into that same mirror and see never ending possibility. I'm never satisfied with where I'm at in life. I'm learning to enjoy the moments in life as they are happening and it is a splendid thing. When I see myself though...I only see room for improvement. I can be better, I can do better. Some would say that you can't truly love yourself if you're not happy with who you are. I say that you can be happy with where you are going, but you should never settle when you can do better.
This topic came to mind because I was having a conversation with a friend that complimented on how driven I am. My first thought was that anyone that truly knows me, might say that I haven't sought out my full potential yet, so I instantly criticized myself. Their response was that I had already done so much in my life, that my accomplishments so far were impressive already. After a moment of thinking about that comment and reflecting on my short lived adulthood...I really have done a lot. So, I think that what I'm trying to get at is that we need to look at the whole picture when we are trying to define success...being rich financially doesn't equate to being rich in life. I got my reminder today....and I still have plenty of time.
Take a second to look at your achievements, the stories you've created, the family you've been lucky enough to grow from a child with and the children you have made yourself...if you have had that joy. Look at these things and think. "Even if I'm not exactly where I want to be, right now in a particular aspect of my life, has the rest been good?" If you can say yes, you're still winning...and if you can't, maybe change some things and see what you can do.
Wednesday, February 6, 2013
Monday, February 4, 2013
Getting older and thinking younger...
When we are children, everything seems to come easy to us. We have the ability to forget about things just as quickly as they happen and they're never an issue again. What happened to our ability to just let things go? I'm sure it will be said that as we get older, direct intent fuels our reasoning for doing things and we understand all possible outcomes. Somewhere in life, we turned into risk takers and careless friends. On the path friend our tiny innocent selves to adulthood, we forgot how consider the effect of our actions on others...some of us just stopped caring all together. As much as these ideas used to bother me, I've learned to accept that some people just can't help the way they are, or refuse to change. Which ever of these two scenarios happens to be the case, being able to see it and acknowledge it will make your life easier.
I'm not going to give a lecture on forgiving and forgetting, because I don't believe that response is a realistic one. I had/have an acquaintance that I used to consider a friend that was for a all accounts, a pretty selfish person. If they didn't get the attention they wanted, you could see their demeanor change right there in that moment. If they felt like they had something better to do than to follow through with plans you had with them, you simply wouldn't hear from them...possibly for weeks after the fact. Sure there are other types also, the kinds that only come around when they're having hard times...the kind that seemingly pop up out of the blue a changed person once or twice a year, like clockwork, without fail...and please let's not forget the most notorious, best friend when I'm single/nowhere to be seen when I'm not-friend. All of these are great examples, but I'll focus on the first.
I had a thought this weekend. I've had it more than once in adult life and his has bitten me in the ass more than once, but the older I get, the easier it is...and the better I understand it. There's no more freeing a feeling than understanding that a problem doesn't lie (sp*) with you and being able to let it go. It really is a good thing to be able to let go of small things. In retrospect, you may be able to look back at something that was HUGE the moment it happened and realize looking back, it doesn't mean anything now. To forgive someone doesn't necessarily mean to literally forgive them to their face. It sometimes just means to let something go. Chalk an incident up to a bad judgment call, or a lapse in character. Sometimes, one bad moment doesn't have to erase all the good ones (I'll save this thought for friendships, specifically). Forgiving is sometimes easier than you might think if you can be open to growing up, just don't ever forget. I'm not saying to hold a grudge or ever even feel it necessary to bring up the bad moment, but as long as you know it is possible...the let down isn't there anymore.
Some people genuinely can't help the way they are, it's engrained in them. It isn't up to you to change them. Just enjoy the good times when they're good and know how to avoid the negativity. When you let the bad business roll off your shoulders, you can walk a little taller. Be the example...be like children.
I'm not going to give a lecture on forgiving and forgetting, because I don't believe that response is a realistic one. I had/have an acquaintance that I used to consider a friend that was for a all accounts, a pretty selfish person. If they didn't get the attention they wanted, you could see their demeanor change right there in that moment. If they felt like they had something better to do than to follow through with plans you had with them, you simply wouldn't hear from them...possibly for weeks after the fact. Sure there are other types also, the kinds that only come around when they're having hard times...the kind that seemingly pop up out of the blue a changed person once or twice a year, like clockwork, without fail...and please let's not forget the most notorious, best friend when I'm single/nowhere to be seen when I'm not-friend. All of these are great examples, but I'll focus on the first.
I had a thought this weekend. I've had it more than once in adult life and his has bitten me in the ass more than once, but the older I get, the easier it is...and the better I understand it. There's no more freeing a feeling than understanding that a problem doesn't lie (sp*) with you and being able to let it go. It really is a good thing to be able to let go of small things. In retrospect, you may be able to look back at something that was HUGE the moment it happened and realize looking back, it doesn't mean anything now. To forgive someone doesn't necessarily mean to literally forgive them to their face. It sometimes just means to let something go. Chalk an incident up to a bad judgment call, or a lapse in character. Sometimes, one bad moment doesn't have to erase all the good ones (I'll save this thought for friendships, specifically). Forgiving is sometimes easier than you might think if you can be open to growing up, just don't ever forget. I'm not saying to hold a grudge or ever even feel it necessary to bring up the bad moment, but as long as you know it is possible...the let down isn't there anymore.
Some people genuinely can't help the way they are, it's engrained in them. It isn't up to you to change them. Just enjoy the good times when they're good and know how to avoid the negativity. When you let the bad business roll off your shoulders, you can walk a little taller. Be the example...be like children.
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